Madame Web

My View: Madame Web (2024) PG-13  Cassandra Webb (Dakota Johnson) is a NYC paramedic who develops clairvoyant powers and repeatedly crosses paths with three young women (Sydney Sweeney, Isabela Merced, and Celeste O’Connor). Cassandra realizes these women must be protected at all costs because they are destined to become superheroes. I have become a fan of Dakota Johnson, who has overcome the albatross of those icky Fifty Shades films. Unfortunately, Dakota looks like she has no idea what this film is about, and I understand that because, after seeing it, I’m not sure either. Madame Web is one of the most poorly written films I have witnessed in my 13 years as a film critic. Add to that fact that the studio went the absolutely cheapest route on special effects and gives us a film about spidermen (and ultimately spider-women) without including the man himself. The dialogue is horrible, and the studio thinks Tahra Rahim, who plays the bad guy, can’t speak English. They have ADR’ed his lines so badly that I’ve seen better dubbing in those 1960s Hercules films made in Italy than this one. By the way, the bad guy has had a long time to come up with a plan to kill the three teen girls, but I guess he spent most of his time playing with his spider because it’s a pretty crappy plan. Add all this, and we have three teen characters that are so annoying that we almost want them to die. I didn’t recognize Sydney Sweeney for nearly half the film because she is wearing a wig that looks like it was borrowed from a community theatre that puts on a yearly Christmas play. The editing is incredibly jumpy, so much so that I would have to see the film three or four times before I could tell you what actually happens in the final action sequence. Those hoping, like I was, that we would see Dakota Johnson doing some superhero things will be disappointed, as she mostly does a lot of running, driving, and complaining about how the three girls aren’t taking things seriously. I hope Emma Roberts and Adam Scott enjoyed their two days on the set and got paid big bucks, but we barely see either of them do anything on the screen but be filler for the too-long run time. I don’t think we will see Madame Web and her Spider-girls anytime soon, and I don’t think the studio believes that either, since it’s one of the few Marvel films without a post-credit scene. My Rating: You Would Have to Pay Me to See it Again  Madame Web Website   Now playing in theatres nationwide.

My View: Bob Marley: One Love (2024) PG-13  The story of how reggae icon Bob Marley (Kingsley Ben-Adir) overcame adversity and an assassination attempt to become a beacon for peace in his country and the world. Kingsley Ben-Adir does a wonderful job portraying Bob Marley, perfectly capturing a man who was a force both on the music stage and in person. Disappointingly, Ben-Air is let down by a script that continually falls back on Marley’s music as a crutch when they get stuck with the storyline. When I saw the trailer, I thought the film was primarily about Marley’s return to Jamaica to bring peace and unity to a country that had known so much bloodshed. Unfortunately, the film isn’t really about that. It’s a meandering story about Marley leaving Jamaica for London to record a legendary album. The film should have been more about the relationship between Marley and his wife, Rita (played by the brilliant Lashana Lynch), who put up with Marley and his relationships with other women. We get to see a little of this, but Rita is more than just another bit player in the life of Marley. This isn’t surprising as the Marley family, mainly his son Ziggy, played a big part in producing the film. So, if you love his music, buy the soundtrack, but if you want to know about his life, watch the 2012 Kevin Macdonald documentary Marley, which will give you a better experience of seeing and enjoying the man, the myth, and the music legend Bob Marley.   My Rating: Bargain Matinee  Bob Marley: One Love Website  Now playing in theaters.

My View: Players (2024)  New York sportswriter Mack (Gina Rodriguez) has spent years developing special and successful hook-up ‘plays’ with her best friend Adam (Damon Wayans Jr.) and their crew. Mack sets her sights on the Big Apple’s most eligible bachelor, war correspondent Nick (Tom Ellis). Mack may have to rethink the ‘game’ entirely when she begins to fall for Nick. I enjoyed this rom-com because of Gina Rodriguez, who has a blast as Mack, a woman tired of playing the field and ready to find true love, not just someone to trick into having a one-night stand. Rodriguez is believable as a sportswriter, specializing in finding human interest stories in strange sports like boxing/chess matches (it is just like it sounds) and has fun with the role. The little gang she runs with is fun, and there is some good chemistry interplay with the group, who each use a play from their vast playbook to seduce both men and women. However, Mack is tired of the game and wants to find someone to share her life with. Mack thinks she has found her man in Nick, played nicely by Tom Ellis. I won’t tell you exactly what happens, but let’s say that, like many rom-coms, love is closer than Mack thinks. Players isn’t a great rom-com, but because of the charisma of Gina Rodriquez, it will satisfy your need for a bit of fun and romance with, spoiler alert, a happy ending.   My Rating: Bargain Matinee  Players Website  Now playing on the Netflix platform.

Indiefest: God & Country (2024) PG-13   Documentary that examines the history of Christian nationalism and its rise in the political landscape. God & Country is a film about how the separation of Church and State is getting less and less and how the rise of Christian nationalism has grown over the past 30 years. The insights that the film gives are based on a lot of the people who study religion, and the commentators not only give out information and historical facts but also give their own experiences with Christian churches and the rise of nationalism from the inside. This film is a terrifying depiction of how close we were to complete chaos on Jan. 6th and that if we're not careful, it could happen again and succeed. Using footage from Christian broadcasts, webcasts, and church sermons, we see how, through the years, nationalism has taken hold in so many churches and how it’s used for political power and fundraising. God & Country is a chilling examination of what our country might become, and it's as terrifying as any horror film that Hollywood has produced.  My Rating: Full Price  God & Country Website   Now playing in theaters.

Indiefest: The Space Race (2023)   Documentary on the experiences of the first Black astronauts, telling the story of breaking barriers and the burden they carried. As a kid who grew up in the 60s, I was a space nut. I watched every launch, and I can tell you where I was when significant events like the landing on the moon or the Challenger explosion happened. So, I know a lot about NASA and its astronauts. Or so I thought. I had no idea about Ed Dwight Jr., an astronaut candidate who was part of John F. Kennedy’s push in the space race and whose candidacy ended with Kennedy’s assassination. Or the story of Robert Lawrence Jr., an astronaut candidate who probably would have been another one who would have broken the barrier in the 60s but died in a test pilot crash. The film gives the men and women who blazed the trail the chance to share their stories in their own voices. It’s a fantastic story of overcoming obstacles that took too long to change. The Space Race allows us to learn about a group of men who were trailblazers and let their stories be told.   My Rating: Full Price  The Space Race Website   The review will be up on Friday, Feb. 16th.

Forgotten Film: Lourdes (2009)   Christine (Sylvie Testud) is a wheelchair-bound woman who has had a dream where she talks to the Virgin Mary and can walk. So she goes to Lourdes, the famous place where the water has performed miracles, hoping that something will happen. Sometimes, the journey is more important than the place you are going to. Lourdes is a film that doesn’t ask you to believe; in fact, many of the people you meet in the movie don’t believe at all. However, it’s also about those same people who are trying to live their lives the best they can. Sylvie Testud is marvelous in the role of Christine, a woman not necessarily looking for a miracle, but looking for love and kindness.   My Rating: Full Price  Lourdes Info The film is available on Disc from Amazon.

Weird Credits: From the credits of Bob Marley: One Love: Desk Operator

Coming Soon to a Screen Near You: Dune: Part Two (2024) PG-13 Paul Atreides (Timothée Chalamet) has found love in Chani (Zendaya) and has the Fremen on his side in getting revenge against the conspirators who murdered his family. Paul may have to choose between love and the universe’s fate as he endeavors to prevent a horrible future only he can foresee. The first film did an excellent job of setting up what will happen in the second film, and we all can’t wait to see it.  Dune: Part Two Website The film will be released on March 1, 2024.

Until Next Time!

Capone

My View:  Capone (2020) R   47-year-old Al Capone (Tom Hardy) has been released from prison after ten years and is back with his wife at his home in Florida. Al is suffering from dementia and other ailments, causing him to relive his past while at the same time, being watched by the FBI, hoping to find money that Al has tucked away. I love Tom Hardy. His performance in Locke (2013) is one of my favorite of all time. Unfortunately, this film is not Hardy at his best; in fact, it might be one of his worst performances. Heavy with prosthetics and an accent that I have no clue what it is, Hardy gives us a bubbling, stumbling Capone who is on his last legs. The film uses Capone’s perspective quite a bit, so you never know where the fantasy starts and reality ends. If you are thinking about watching this film, hoping for gunfights and bombastic performances, you will be sorely disappointed. The film is frustratingly slow and other than watching Hardy’s Capone waste away, not much happens. I will warn you that it got its R rating for a few very violent scenes, mostly due to Capone’s dementia. Frankly, I was just waiting for Capone to die so that this film would end.   My Rating: Cable    Capone Website       Available for rent on participating on-demand services.

Indiefest:  CRSHD (2019)   On the last night of her college freshman year, Izzy (Isabelle Barbier) tries to finally lose her virginity. Still, her only hope is if she and her two best friends can get her into the exclusive, invite-only ‘Crush Party.’ I wanted to like this film, but it felt like a first film from a recent college graduate, which it is. The cast is a little green, though I did like Sadie Scott as the wild child best friend of Izzy, who has a flair for comedy. The film feels like it would be a big hit on a college campus at a university film fest, but it just seems a little shallow and slow in the big world. The film relies too much on gadgets such as a video-game-like map to show the girl's travels and a three-way split of the screen to show when the girls or texting to each other. The production values are excellent, and for a first-time film of such a young filmmaker, it’s a fine-looking film but just never quite gets going.   My Rating: Cable    CRSHD Website       Available for rent on participating on-demand services.

Indiefest:  Straight Up (2019)   Todd (James Sweeney) is gay and hasn’t had any luck finding love. Rory (Katie Findlay) is an actress who is just looking for a roommate. Rory and Todd discover that they might not be your typical couple, but they might be great at being together. I enjoyed this quirky film about a couple that are perfect for each other, except for the fact that Todd is gay. James Sweeney, who plays Todd, also wrote and directed the film, but he gave the best part in the movie to Katie Findlay, who shines in the role of Rory. Findlay delivers her lines with great comedic timing and dominates every scene she is in. I was reminded of a young Lauren Graham watching Findlay on the screen as her Rory plays off the reserved and ever nervous Todd. The film doesn’t always work, but with Findlay’s performance, you are willing to see it through to the end.   My Rating: Bargain Matinee     Straight Up Website        Available for rent on participating on-demand services.

My View:  The Wrong Missy (2020)   Tim (David Spade) goes on a blind date from hell with Missy (Lauren Lapkus). Lucky to end the disaster date, three months later, Tim meets a woman, Melissa (Molly Sims), by chance in an airport, and she is everything he could ever want in a woman. He decides to ask Melissa to a corporate retreat and, by mistake, invites Missy instead, and Tim’s life will never be the same. Thank goodness I didn’t see this in a theatre and could stop it every ten minutes to do something, anything else to get my mind off how bad this film is. Please, please Netflix, quit giving Adam Sandler money to finance his friends to make movies. I beg you, stop the madness. I felt terrible for some of the actors in this film, like Lauren Lapkus, who I like as a comedy actress and Sarah Chalke, who I hoped enjoyed the week she got in Hawaii (where they shot the film). David Spade does show some restraint in his part, but the jokes are horrible, the plot is stupid, and watching Rob Schneider mug his way through is performance as a boat captain is painful to watch. Stay away from this one!   My Rating: You Would Have to Pay Me to See it Again    The Wrong Missy Website    The film is currently available on Netflix.

Forgotten Film: The Last Run (1971) GP   Harry (George C. Scott) is a retired getaway driver living in a small Portuguese fishing village. Harry has become bored with his life and decides to take on one last job, a job that won’t turn out the way Harry planned to go out. Scott, hot off his Oscar for Patton, wanted to do a ‘Humphrey Bogart’ type role, and he carries it off with style. The film uses incredible locations in Europe, fantastic driving sequences (wait until you see the opening sequence on a tiny mountain road) and a brilliant cast, including Trish Van Devere, who plays a woman who is being used as bait by her boyfriend to get Harry to take the job. Scott is masterful as a man who hasn’t much to live for other than the thrill of driving as fast as he can.   My Rating: Full Price    The Last Run Info

Weird Credits: From the credits of Capone: Chef Driver

Coming Soon to a Screen Near You: Military Wives (2019) PG-13   With their partners away serving in Afghanistan, two headstrong women (Kristin Scott Thomas, Sharon Horgan) form a choir on a military base. The women in the choir form a bond that transforms their lives and gives them a way to deal with the reality of the everyday fear that their loved ones won’t return from the war. From two-time Oscar-nominated director Peter Cattaneo, this film just might be the uplifting film we need at this time.     The Military Wives Info

Until Next Time!

Miss Bala

My View:  Miss Bala  (2019)  PG-13  Gloria (Gina Rodriguez) goes to Mexico to party with her best friend. Next thing she knows, she is involved in a dangerous world of cross-border crime. Now she fights to find her friend and get the heck out of Mexico. Why Gina Rodriquez would agree to make a movie this bad is beyond me. A plot that has so many holes in it the size of the border of Mexico and Texas and an ending that is beyond stupid makes this film almost unwatchable. All you need to know is that the film was directed by Catharine Hardwicke, who also directed the first Twilight movie.   My Rating: Cable   Miss Bala Website

Indiefest:  They Shall Not Grow Old  (2018)  R   A documentary on World War I told in a new way, from the men who fought the battle to save the world. An absolutely fantastic film from Peter Jackson who took over 100 hours of footage and made a movie that is moving and a loving tribute to the men who fought in ‘the war to end all wars.’ The movie is in 3D, so you need to see this in the theatres. It’s a remarkable film, one of the best documentaries that I have seen. The footage has been restored and made to look like modern film, with added colorization to make it, even more, stand out. He also hired a team of lip readers, so throughout the film, you hear what the soldiers were saying on the screen. The film is narrated by men who fought in the war from interviews they did in the 60s and 70s. I will warn you that this film is very graphic in depicting the horrors of war, including numerous shots of dead bodies. This is a film that should be seen by everyone because it is a touching tribute to the men who risked their lives to fight a war to save Europe.  My Rating: I Would Pay to See This Again    They Shall Not Grow Old Website

In Case You Missed It (A movie just released on DVD/Blu-Ray):  Boy Erased  (2018)  R  The son (Lucas Hedges) of a Baptist preacher (Russell Crowe) is forced to go to a church-sponsored gay conversion program. If he doesn’t complete the program, his family will kick him out. While Lucas Hedges gives us a passionate and insightful performance as the troubled Jared, it’s the performances of Russell Crowe and Nicole Kidman that shine in this film. Crowe, playing the father who is conflicted by his love of his son versus the conviction of his faith that the gay lifestyle is wrong in the eyes of his religion gives a first-rate performance. Kidman is brilliant as the mom who is conflicted by the love of her son and the religious beliefs of her husband. I was let down by this film because it never delivers the emotional punch that the film needs.    My Rating:  Bargain Matinee    Boy Erased Website

Forgotten Film:  Looker  (1981)  PG  Written and directed by Michael Crichton, the film is about a plastic surgeon (Albert Finey) who is asked to make precise corrections to a bunch of models faces. Once he does the fix, he finds out that the models are being killed off and he decides to investigate their murders. This low budget sci-fi film is a bit looney, but it also is a lot of fun to watch especially Finey’s performance. A really strange little gem.   My Rating: Bargain Matinee    Looker Info

Weird Credits:  From the credits of Miss Bala: Temp Colorist

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You:  Us  (2019) A family goes to their beach house for a vacation only to be surprised by unexpected visitors that will turn their vacation into chaos. This is the latest film from Jordan Peale, who gave us the Oscar-winning film Get Out (2017).   Us Website

Until Next Time!

Deepwater Horizon

My View:  Deepwater Horizon  (2016)  PG-13  Mike Williams (Mark Wahlberg) is the chief electronics technician on the floating oil rig named, Deepwater Horizon. Williams will need all his skills when the rig explodes and creates one of the worst oil spills of all time.  It takes a while to get this film going but once the explosions start, the film seems to move at breathtaking speed. I loved the action in this movie, and director Peter Berg knows how to film those scenes to get the audience right there in with the characters. The movie has an outstanding cast with Kurt Russell giving a stellar performance as the safety expert of the rig and Gina Rodriquez, who gives a sympathetic and moving performance as the pilot of the rig.  There is tremendous chemistry between Russell and Wahlberg, which makes their characters seem more like father and son than co-workers. Even though I knew what was going to happen, I was mesmerized by the thrilling action sequences and gripping performances.   My Rating:  I Would Pay to See it Again    Deepwater Horizon Website

My View:  Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children  (2016)  PG-13  Jake (Asa Butterfield) goes on a quest to find the home that his grandfather told so many stories about.  First off I must tell you not to take young children to this film. There are parts that are quite scary, and there is one scene that would be disturbing to young kids (heck, it was disturbing to me). I liked this film and feel it is one of the better adaptations of a Young Adult book genre.  The storyline is fascinating and inventive.  The special effects are well done and fun. I especially enjoyed Eva Green’s performance as Miss Peregrine, as she made her character likable but also very strange. The bad guys, led by Samuel L. Jackson, are creepy and sometimes shocking, which gives a horror tinge to the film.  I enjoyed the ending of the movie and hope there will be more as I would like to revisit this strange world of “peculiar children.”    My Rating:  Full Price   Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children Website

My View:  Masterminds  (2016)  PG-13  David (Zach Galifianakis) is a security guard who drives an armored car every day. With a group of half-brained criminals, David does the impossible and steals more than $17 million.  Now, will he be able to keep the money? While I did enjoy that not just one, but two characters share my name, overall I did not enjoy this film.  The laughs were few and far between and most I had already seen from the trailer/commercials. A little of Galifianakis shtick goes a long way, and I grew tired of his character very early on. I did enjoy the quirky performance of Kate McKinnon, who plays David’s weird fiancé. Her character steals the film, as she deadpan’s her way throughout. The plot is based on a true story, but it’s predictable and, at times, just not funny.   My Rating:  Bargain Matinee   Masterminds Website

Indiefest:  The Dressmaker  (2015)  R  A glamorous woman, Tilly (Kate Winslet) returns to her small town in rural Australia.  While she changes the style and dress of the women of the small town, she is there to get revenge on those who did her wrong in the past. I enjoyed this film that is part mystery, part revenge film, and part comedy. Winslet is scintillating as the stylish woman in the couture dresses clashing with the people of a small, isolated town.  Judy Davis is perfect as the crazy mother that Tilly has come back to care for. I loved Hugo Weaving as the police officer in town who has a penchant for wearing women's clothing. And there is great chemistry between Winslet and Liam Hemsworth, who plays her love interest. There are plenty of twists and turns to make the mystery interesting, and you won’t believe the ending. Tilly is a beautiful woman on a mission, someone you might want to meet, but you wouldn’t want to get on her bad side.  My Rating:  Full Price  The Dressmaker Website

Forgotten Films:  The Seven-Ups  (1973)  PG  Buddy (Roy Scheider) is part of an elite police team that is little known and mostly undercover.  The team focuses on crimes that can get more than seven years in prison when convicted.  When investigating the murder of his partner, Buddy uncovers a plot to kidnap mobsters for large ransoms.  This is a smart and gritty film where the cops don’t always follow the rules to get their convictions. Scheider is intense and scintillating as the cop on a mission that may get him killed. There is an rousing car chase that rivals the car chase sequence in the 1968 film Bullitt.   My Rating:  Full Price   The Seven-Ups Info

Weird Credits:  From the credits of Masterminds:  Props; Silicone Eel

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You: Underworld: Blood Wars (2016)  I am a sucker for Kate Beckinsale and her portrayal of the kickass vampire Selene. The first film is still the best one in the series, but I am just happy to have her back killing vamps.   Underworld: Blood Wars Info

Until Next Time!